When we were first pregnant my husband and I were at our local bookstore, just browsing, something we both love to do. As we were leaving the store we met 3 pregnant women each carrying a pile of about 10 parenting books. My husband being the gentleman that he was offered to help them. The told us happily that they were all due the same month and were already planning a playgroup for themselves and their new babies. “We all got the same parenting books so we can read them and have the same perspectives on child-rearing.”
My husband and I helped them to the cashier as we gave each other amused looks. But then after they left, I had my first twinge of Mommy insecurity. You know that feeling that you are doing everything wrong by your child and everyone else is doing everything right? At that point I only had the book, “What To Expect When You Are Expecting” nothing else. I expressed my fears to my husband, “Maybe they aren’t crazy and we are! Maybe our unborn child will suffer because we are not planning on reading a library worth of parenting books? Maybe we are relegating our child to a backward existence because we only had one parenting book in our possession and it was only about pregnancy.” I was about to walk back to the parenting section of the bookstore to acquire my own teetering stack of books, when my husband put a reassuring hand on my shoulder, and with the voice of sanity that he has used many times over the years in my many insane moments said, “We will be fine, don’t worry about it.”
We all have moments of “Mommy insecurity.” I see it everywhere. As Moms we seem so unsure. Is it the conflicting advice, the break up of traditional family units, the rise of child and teen depression, our harried pace? Whatever it is, we should try to stop thinking we are doing it all wrong. We need to create support systems and get the help and advice that we need in order to parent more confidently.
Let me know what you think…
What can we do to combat “Mommy insecurity?”
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