There are many children who struggle in school. As parents we want to help. It is hard to see our kids doing poorly and not living up to their potential. Unfortunately there are things that we say that can make it worse:
“You are not trying hard enough. If you just applied yourself you would be able to do better!”
“Your schoolwork is so disorganized! You need to shape up or you will never do well in school!”
The above examples are judgment statements. Children are being evaluated and are coming up short. This type of language does not motivate children but causes them to feel even more anxious. It also builds resentment.
Parents need to focus on the situation at hand. They need to concentrate on what their child needs and not on their child’s character.
“It seems as if school is not as interesting as it once was for you. Am I noticing that correctly? Is there anything you could think of that would help you enjoy learning more?”
“I see that improvement is needed in the area of organization. Let’s put our heads together and see if we can come up with some ideas that could help you get in order.”
When kids struggle in school, they need our support and unconditional love. Most kids want to succeed and do well in school. They need us to help them focus on solutions without judging them and their character. This is one of the best ways to help our kids succeed and stop struggling with school.
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This post is part of a whole series on Help For Kids Who Struggle With School