Instead of Denying Children’s Feelings:
Reflect Your Child’s Feelings:
“There is a direct connection between how kids feel and how children behave. When kids feel right, they’ll behave right. How do we help them to feel right? By accepting their feelings!”
-How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk
Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish
Some kids have a rough time with their school work. It does not help when we tell kids:
“You just need to try harder”
“School is very important. You need to take this seriously!”
Most kids are trying hard and they do want to do well in school. Kids who are struggling, struggle because they might have trouble understanding a concept or they might be missing some vital information. Or they can have a more serious learning disability.
The best way for us to help our kids through their everyday struggles is to deliver empathy and accept our kids feelings instead of denying their feelings. When we tell our children how to feel or we don’t let them express themselves they get frustrated, discouraged and angry.
It can be tough for parents to talk to our kids about schoolwork because it is so important to us. Sometimes we need to let go. Once we do, kids will be less stressed and more cooperative. They might feel less isolated and be able to share with us, their parents, the struggles that are experiencing.
Knowing that they have our understanding and compassion will give them the courage and push that they need to manage the big and little challenges of school.
Most kids who are struggling in school want to hear:
“You sound frustrated with this work…”
“This math homework seems a bit tricky to you…”
“Something about school is bothering you…”
“You sound like you would like a little more help understanding your science assignment…”
Delivering empathy can do wonders for our relationship with our kid and can truly help our kids when they struggle in school.
To learn great ways to deliver empathy to your kids, buy our Parenting Simply audios here.