Parents are always wondering if they are parenting “right.” This is not the first time I have addressed this on my blog. I know as a young mom, it always seemed like I was getting it wrong. Even now, after 18 years of motherhood, I still question myself. It is not easy being a parent!
After going through my blog posts, I found these 4 basic parenting principles that can really help us feel as if we are getting it right…
1. Know your strengths and use them:
Many times we look at what other parents are doing and we try to emulate them. We might look at our friend the athlete who is running around in the yard with his kids and making up games. Or we might have a friend who is a fabulous baker and is always cooking with her kids. Instead, we need to look inward and see what it is we love to do and share it with our kids. If you love to read, read your favorite books with your children. If you love to knit, teach them how to knit. Involving kids in your hobbies will help you parent more confidently. It is always good to share with others what you feel passionate about.
2. Stick to the limits that you set:
Children need rules and limits that are fair and consistent. It makes them feel safe, secure and encouraged. When we are wishy-washy with our rules, kids feel rootless, they don’t know what to expect. The irony is that kids will fight you tooth and nail to get you to back down from your rules but deep down they don’t want to win.
3. Use Positive Self-Talk:
So often I hear parents saying, “I am such a bad mother/father!” “My kids are always misbehaving!”
This kind of talk can make parents feel hopeless. It is always better to be positive:
“I make mistakes but in general, I am a good parent.” “Sometimes my kids misbehave, but for the most part they are good kids.”
When we speak or even think in a positive manner we are able to cope with our problems more effectively.
4. Be calm:
The best gift we can give our kids is to parent with calmness. We need to take time for ourselves, try to get the sleep we need, and eat healthy (at least some of the time.) It is helpful to make sure that everyone in the family, kids and adults alike, have some sort of relaxation ritual built in to their day. A calm family is an encouraged family.
There you have it. 4 basic parenting principles that can help you get your parenting right…