To respond to your child’s worry:

Instead of telling your child not to worry:

“Don’t worry about Sara, it’s no big deal to get your tonsils out.”

Accept there feelings and say “even though you know”:

“You seem upset about Sara being in the hospital. Even though you know, that getting your tonsils out is a simple surgery, you are still a little worried for her.”

To stop a child from an unsafe behavior:

Instead of warning:

“You better wear your helmet! Do you want to get killed?!”

Say “I am concerned”:

I am concerned, that you will hurt yourself when you forget the rule about bike helmets.”

To help your child to stick to your rules:

Instead of accusing:

“You are acting selfish! You better share your toys!”

Accept feelings and say “Nevertheless”:

“I see that you are really having a hard time sharing your toys.  Nevertheless, the toys in this playroom are to be shared.”

For more simple effective communication techniques, join our How To Talk workshop.

Adina

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